i just figured it out… the moment i knew for sure i loved you. I was sitting in the waiting room of the ER, my legs deciding to be uncooperative… i don’t remember exactly what i was talking about at the moment, but i’d imagine i was laughing and smiling, because i had never been to the ER before, and since my injury wasn’t major, there was no reason to be upset…. Then, you walked around the corner into the waiting room. I saw you and i was surprised, even though i knew you were on your way. My heart stopped for a second, i’m sure i felt warmth and peace and i couldn’t help but smile and laugh as you walked over. It was all probably mixed with embarrassment for being in the ER but for the moment, it was perfect, everything messed up but so perfect at the same time. 

We may have said it the day before… but the moment you walked around the corner reassured me that i didn’t have to regret it. 

Then when i was standing alone on the curbside, the wind cooling the tears on my face. That’s when i became silent. Powerless… those words all of a sudden meant nothing. 

thanks for promising everything and then taking it back. one day you’ll know how it feels… but i wouldn’t wish it on you, because i know that it’s the worst feeling you could ever imagine.